You’re at a cocktail party in your office and you see the H.R. laugh at your boyfriend’s jokes over and over again. She even takes a glass from the bartender and presents it with a smile, and your boyfriend smiles back.
You feel jealousy start to overwhelm you. Now you don’t know whether to look at your partner with disappointment and leave the party or tell the girl H.R. mind your own business.
When someone flirts with your partner, things can get awkward very quickly, but approaching the situation strategically and calmly is enough to know how to respond successfully.
We offers an action plan for how to react when someone flirts with your partner.
Study The Circumstances
Determine if a reaction is worth your time and sanity by evaluating the context of the situation. After all, it’s not your partner’s fault that someone is flirting with him.
Suppose it is temporary and happens right in front of you, like a long conversation between your partner and someone at a party, or a laugh shared between them and your cousin.
In that case, it may be wise to let it go. The mere fact that this is happening in front of your eyes indicates, most likely, that there is nothing they are hiding or that you need to worry about. They are just having fun.
If It’s Light Flirting, Use It In Your Favor To Reconnect With Your Partner
Situations like the ones we described above can generate jealousy because we realize that our partner can enjoy the attention of another person.
But instead of releasing jealousy in a negative way, it’s smarter to make it work for you. The person who enjoys the jokes or conversations of your partner is seeing something special and attractive in them, of course.
Try to rediscover this yourself. You will probably quickly recognize how lucky you are to be with them and may even be motivated to work harder on your relationship.
If Flirting Is Intense Or Persistent, Watch Their Reaction
Suppose the person you are flirting with is regularly present in your life, such as a colleague or childhood friend. In that case, things can get extremely awkward or damage the relationship.
Observe how your partner handles the situation. If they don’t flirt back, radically change the subject, or engages you in the conversation, it is clear that they’re trying to avoid inappropriate flirting behavior.
Tell Your Partner What You Think And Feel
It is also possible that your partner is uncomfortable following unwanted leads, but is shy or does not know how to stop the comments. They may not even know that the circumstances are irritating you.
In that case, it’s best, to be honest with each other: state that the third-party’s behavior bothers you, explain why you think it’s inappropriate, and ask them to stop quickly the next time it happens.
We recommend that you view the conversation with a positive attitude. You can make them feel appreciated and flattered by your jealous reaction. But if you treat them as suspects, you may have an argument.
Take The Bull By The Horns And Confront The Flirter
Certainly being jealous can make you want to get up and tell that flirty person a few things, and in extreme cases, you should.
If it’s someone you’re familiar or close with, and the flirting is getting out of control, separate that person from the crowd and confront them with the truth.
Let’s say one of your classmates keeps smiling suspiciously at your husband, laughing at his jokes, and goes out of the way to touch his arm and bring her face close to his, carelessly.
If something makes you think it was done inadvertently, explain what you think and tell them that what they did upset you.
But suppose it is clear that the flirter is acting shamelessly of their own choosing. In that case, simply describe the scene and unmask them by asking why they are behaving so boldly.
When was the last time you felt jealous for no reason? Tell us your funniest story about jealousy in the comments!