We all know the feeling of being in love. That head-over-heels, can’t-get-enough, butterflies-in-the-stomach kind of love. It’s what we all strive for, and it’s what we all hope to find.
When it comes to love, we all have our own language. Whether it’s through words of affirmation, quality time, acts of service, physical touch, or receiving gifts, we each have a way of expressing and receiving love that fills us up.
In 1992, Dr. Gary Chapman wrote a book called The 5 Love Languages: The Secret to Love That Lasts, which has since become a bestseller. In it, he argues that there are five ways to express and receive love and that everyone has a “primary love language” that speaks to them more than the others.
But what happens when the love starts to fade? When the butterflies disappear and we’re left feeling empty and alone?
What is your love language?
Do you know what your love language is? If not, take the quiz! It’s quick and easy, and it will help you to better understand how you express and receive love.
Once you know your love language, you can start to speak it more often. If you know your partner’s love language, you can start to love them in the way that they need to be loved. It’s all about giving and receiving love in a way that fills up your love tank!
This is where the five love languages come in.
The five love languages are:
- Words of Affirmation
- Quality Time
- Receiving Gifts
- Acts of Service
- Physical Touch
Each person has their own love language, and it’s important to identify which one is yours. Why? Because when you know your love language, you can then express love in a way that will be received and appreciated by your partner.
Let’s take a closer look at each love language.
Words of Affirmation
If words of affirmation are your love language, then you thrive on hearing positive words from your partner. Compliments, words of appreciation, and words of encouragement are music to your ears.
Without these words, you feel unloved and unimportant.
If quality time is your love language, then you feel loved when your partner makes time for you. You want to spend time together, whether it’s going on dates, taking walks, or just cuddling on the couch.
You feel neglected when your partner is always busy and you’re left feeling like an afterthought.
If receiving gifts is your love language, then you feel loved when your partner gives you thoughtful gifts. It doesn’t have to be anything expensive, but it should be something that shows they were thinking of you.
You feel unappreciated when your partner never gives you gifts, or when they give you gifts that are clearly not well thought out.
Acts of Service
If acts of service are your love language, then you feel loved when your partner does things to help you out. This could be things like cooking dinner, taking the dog for a walk, or doing grocery shopping.
You feel taken for granted when your partner doesn’t help out, or when they do things half-heartedly.
If physical touch is your love language, then you feel loved when your partner touches you. This could be anything from holding hands to kissing to sex.
You feel unloved when your partner doesn’t touch you, or when they touch you in a way that feels perfunctory.
Now that you know the five love languages, it’s time to put them into practice. Talk to your partner about your love language and ask them what theirs is. Once you know, you can start expressing love in a way that will be received and appreciated.